The Ride Guide

It's summer time, when people enjoy taking trips and trying new experiences. We love to get away. However, you've gotta tough out the traveling in order to reach your destination . I spent almost 10 hours on a bus this weekend. Not exactly my ideal situation but hey, you do what you gotta do, and you make the best of it.

If flying first class isn't an option (and you're traveling alone) here's a quick guide for your next long ride:

As always, your seat selection plays a pivotal role in determining your comfort and happiness.

Stop wasting time and snatch the aisle seat. The window's for chumps. Sure, the view's better, but then you have to bug your neighbor every time you want to stretch your legs or use the restroom.

Once you've secured the prime real estate, it's lottery time.

This is just like the mating process. On boarding passengers scope out the room and begin sizing up their options. "Can I deal with this guy for the next 5 hours? That's a creepy tattoo. Is he gonna be a problem?"

Meanwhile, you should place your bag on the window seat to mark your territory. Then throw on a pair of sunglasses, headphones, and bust out your most convincing fake sleeping act to fend off the oncoming traffic. The goal, of course, is to hit the jackpot double seater. Unfortunately, while we all take the gamble, success is rare. Eventually, somebody will probably ask if they can squeeze in.

Now just cross your fingers that you don't get stuck with a sloppy sandwich eater, a snowball, a smelly snowball, a crying baby, a sleepy shoulder slumper, an overly loud headphone listener, a shoe remover, a cell phone chatter, or a snorer. Good luck.

Initiating conversation... Well, that's your call. Personally, I've met some awesome people over the years and it really helps to pass the time. Besides, if you want to abort all of the chitchat, you can always pull a quick dip to the bathroom. Then, on your return, revert to the magazine move or take the the iPod/sleeping route. They'll get the point.

Finally, it's assumed that you've brought the traditional arsenal which consists of music, magazines and candy. You should be all set.

Enjoy the ride and stay sprezzin'...

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